Tractors...There once was a man who was a massive and I mean a MASSIVE tractor fan.
He had tractor posters, clothes with tractors on them and subscribed to Tractors Monthly, seriously, the guy was obsessed!
One day he was attending the biggest ever tractor convention, He saw an amazing tractor, he hopped in it, turned the ignition and revved the engine and loved it. Sadly, security tapped him on the shoulder and told him to get out.
He moved on to an ever bigger tractor and the same thing happened.
Finally he got to sit in the biggest tractor in the world ever, and revved the engine but was then grabbed by security and chucked out of the convention. Once outside they shouted at him he was banned from every tractor convention everywhere, forever.
It started to rain as the man sat there bawling his eyes out, ripping all the tractor images off his clothes.
Suddenly he saw a nearby house that was on fire with loads of people stood around it. A woman was screaming that her two children were still inside but the fire service was yet to arrive.
Boldly, the man proclaimed "Stand back everyone! I'll take care of this!"
And sure enough, he smashed his way throught the front door and, to the amazement of the crowd, sucked in all of the smoke in the entire house, allowing the children to escape.
"That was amazing!" cried the mother "How did you do that?!"
"Well" the man said.......
"I'm an ex-tractor fan!"